I received a call from my sister Sandy last night that she had just found my dad deceased in his home. What a surreal moment. My heart broke for her as she was so upset. I can't imagine what that moment felt like for her.
My dad was kind of aloof and had a hard time expressing his feelings. Our relationship has always been kind of distant. We only spoke a couple times a year, and that was always instigated by a phone call from me. When I visited my family in IN, I would see him when he made his weekly visit to my sister's house to see the grandkids. That was the extent of our interaction.
As the years progressed, I became bolder in letting him know that I loved him. I pray that he actually knew how much.
It appears that he passed away in his sleep sometime over the last few days. I pray that he did not suffer any physical pain.
Most of all, I pray with all my heart that he had come to know the Lord. It may sound strange that I wasn't close enough to him to know this, but that is part of the limitations of the relationship that he had with everyone. I won't know for sure until I reach Heaven, but I do pray that he will be there to greet me.
I'm heading to IN later this morning. I'll spend a week there with my sister and help her with decisions and all that goes into these situations. My family is estranged from each other. I am the link between everyone. I pray that the heightened emotions will not cause the problems to escalate. I pray that perhaps we can all come together as a family.
More than anything, I pray that God is glorified and honored as our Creator and Sustainer. And that He is sought after as our Savior.
I pray that I will be honoring to our precious Father in Heaven and shine with His light as I'm with those who do not know Him.
I miss my Dad even though we have spent so little time together over the years. I never thought this moment would be so emotional for me, since we weren't very close. But God puts love in our hearts that supersedes our human logic.
Our God is Holy. And I pray that my Daddy knows Him.
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